Today I have taken 6mg of long acting stuff this afternoon, my regular 12mg long acting doseage this evening and when that didn’t do anything after two and a half hours, I’m sitting here after having taken another 20mg of The Moose and I’m waiting for: A) Nausea B) Headache C) Pain to go away. Sadly enough, it will probably be in that order, too.
I am crossed somewhere between scared and terrified about my appointment with Fam Doc next week. This isn’t working. Taking 6mg of long acting stuff in the afternoon doesn’t accomplish anything other than make me feel tired and stupid, the pain is only barely buffered so it’s tolerable in the afternoon and I can’t even sleep any of this off. My body hurts so much that I can’t find any place comfortable to sleep or to rest.
NOTHING IS WORKING.
I have this painfully nagging feeling that not even the Cesamet is going to work next week.
I can’t keep doing this — my stomach aches constantly, my ankles fall asleep ~when~ I sleep (all the way up to the groin some nights) and I feel like I’ve been beaten with a baseball bat. Even my fingers hurt. My pain is not supposed to be this way.
Everything seems to be spiralling down into a hole that I can’t get out of.
Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi. You’re my only hope.
(Side thought: Got a call from Rheumy II’s office. I’m officially in the books for my first appointment on Aug. 05 @ 10am)