I am at a crossroad…

Long time no write.

This past January gave me the opportunity to participate in two different projects which I would never have imagined would be possible, hence my disappearance from my sorely neglected, but not entirely abandoned, blog.

To begin with, I finally got the chance to partake in the Pulmonary Hypertention Yoga program. It rocked my socks off, no kidding.

It was 12 weeks of Iyengar yoga, in which each pose had been specifically modified for PH patients. I am still amazed at how much of a difference it made to the little things in life — being able to reach more easily above my head for the top shelf of kitchen cabinets, singing(!) albeit terribly was an amazing feeling, and being able to breathe was of course the biggest one which I didn’t realize until about Weeks 10/11, when I managed to get myself an unpleasant Lung infection which took me out of class. I did rejoin class for the end at Week 12 of the program, which was then followed by 12 weeks of absolute nothingness.

Through my participation with the PAH-Yoga research, I was introduced to another program which involved learning how to do Patient Engagement Research.

This is my current dilemma. Well, maybe not quite dilemma, as The Hubbs & I have made a decision regarding whether or not to continue my participation in the internship program due to:

1) My current health
2) My (in)ability to stave off infection due to increased interaction with the general population, and specifically other patients, as was expressed by HawtDoc
3) I am having surgery in September, which is basically when class lecture resumes AND when my participation will be required for the research portion of my Internship.

I finally bit the bullet this afternoon, with a heavy heart, relaying the sad news that I had to pull out of the program due to the above mentioned points. So I left the message short & sweet and left it at that.

I just opened my email about an hour ago and found a reply from my instructor. I am now facing the biggest issue that I am torn between:

1) Dropping the program in its entirely (like the original plan)
2) Or perhaps try completing the program at home, a suggestion put forth by my instructor. Maybe even via Skype or the like, as we did back in the spring — I was too sick & tired from that lung infection to attend class in person, but I still wanted to do as much as I possibily could with the technologies available to me at the time.
3) Optionally, if I decide that it’s worth it to try completing the program, there’s a possibility of joining one of the other research groups, thereby dropping my own group’s research project & paper.

Crossroads.

I haz them.

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