Frustrated, Ashamed, Tired & Embarassed.

My current mental state.

Friday night I had dinner with my family because Mom’s cousin’s daughter was in town — She works for Air Canada and they shipped her out to Calgary during the airline strike and then everyone was ordered back to work and so she was heading back home on Saturday.

Along with the obligatory family dinner, came family photos. I am fat, ugly and blobby. There’s no discernable neck-chin-face line. I am a blob.

WTF is up with my nose??

I am frustrated, ashamed, and embarassed at the way I look. (What the is up with my nose!?)

I’m tired of the fact that I can’t seem to shake the exhaustion to get moving. I’m frustrated at not having the motivation to do exercise, not to mention ashamed and embarassed of my appearance which has been the result of many months of increased steroid use.

The biggest thing that’s shaming me right now, is the fact I have to go see Kidney Guy on Thursday and his nurse will most likely just point out my extreme moonface (which is what the blobbiness is for the most part). I seem to be retaining ridiculous amounts of fluids with no means of getting them out of my body no matter how much liquids I consume to rid myself of all this. RheumyII I see next Tuesday and she is going to shame me even further without giving me any helpful or useful information as to how we can deal with this blobbiness other than “walk 30 minutes a day — 10 minutes, three times a day!”.

I am ultimately very, very upset about this and am feeling so let down by my body. For some reason SALLY, the Lupus, the PAH, etc doesn’t upset me nearly as much as turning into the human blob does… which I suppose, is caused by all of the above, but still, I view it as being more as a problem with the damn cortisone bumps.

I wish someone could help me get rid of all this damn fluid. I wish Kidney Guy’s nurse would increase my damn water pill doseage. Perhaps I should start drinking barley tea again (or PT mentioned green tea) or get Mom to make the potions cuz that seemed to help keep the fluids down and at bay.

Anyone have any suggestions? :(

Still gooey…

Isn’t that a wonderful mental picture?

Yea, I’m still gooey — my nose, primarily but also my chest to some degree. Not a lot, only when I wake up in the morning or after a nap, but it’s still pretty nasty.

I only mention this because tomorrow is going to be kind of a sucky day for me. I have that CT Scan with contrast and then a blood gas afterwards. I don’t actually see Hawt Doc until Wednesday afternoon. It was kind of weird the way things got booked this time around.

I’m not terribly thrilled with the idea of being stabbed twice in one day, but I guess there’s not much that can be done when you take the only appointments available. As I was saying to The Hubbs, it might be kind of nice to find out if my oxygen levels have dropped, only because then perhaps the government might be more willing to pay for my oxygen… but it’s really NOT a good thing, because then it means that things are going downhill. Such a stupid way of having to think of things. *sigh*

So yea, I’m tired and I’m gooey.

As an aside, I’ve been thinking long and hard about a couple of things this weekend. Since I had nothing else to do but try and sleep lots, drink lots of fluids & vitamin C, and try breathing like a normal human being, some of my time was spent on Saturday watching TV. Something I hadn’t done in forever. I ended up catching a stupid infomercial partway through its advertisment and now I’ve been thinking long and hard about my state of being. I have been more unhappy with myself, for at least the better part of a year to a year and a half. I want to make solid changes in my life to lose weight, eat better and I guess this is, indeed, how infomercials suck you in.

The interesting thing about this program is that it takes into consideration people with hypoglycemia issues, diabetes, food allergies and a few other health conditions and how to customize the plan for those situations, which is why I’ve been pondering this all weekend. I know that these changes require strict adherance to their plans and I know I’m not good at following rules like that. But I’m thinking that perhaps this would at least give me a good foundation and roadmap to start with.

I’ve been contemplating making a lifestyle change for awhile now and The Hubbs is behind me 100% if this is what I want to do and if I think it will help. We’ve discussed making solid eating changes for at least a good couple of years, but never truly implemented them because I didn’t know where to start. Obviously with my doing all the cooking, it will be slanted towards what I will need nutritionally and The Hubbs will be along for the ride, making changes to whatever I prepare to make his meals more palatable. There’s basically a no salt, no sugar, no fats and no wheat during the first 6 weeks of this plan (possibly throughout the entire time that you’re in the weight loss phase, but I don’t know since I haven’t actually purchased anything) and then things are slowly added back into your diet in moderation once you’ve hit the point where you’re maintaining your weight loss.

I have my doubts, I have my skepticism and I have lots of worry. I always worry. I’m scared that if I take on something like this, it won’t work and it will backfire and then I’ll gain another 20+ pounds in the process. That’s my biggest worry. I don’t want to be in this body. I don’t want to be stuck in a body that’s unhealthily fat on top of being stuck with SALLY. I know that if I start this, the weight that will be coming off to begin with will be all water weight, it’s getting past that point and continuing on and muscling through while I’m feeling discouraged that will be the challenge. I know that being abnormal will make any lifestyle change a completely different experience, I’m just hoping that perhaps if nothing else, it will get me doing the basics a little better.

All the negativity surrounding buying into a program like this, especially coming from an infomercial, is raging its ugly head. There’s so much that could make me fail, so many people that could wag a finger at me saying that I should just be a grown up by watching what I eat, do my exercise and drink lots of water. So many things that could be said to dissuade me from doing this. Maybe that’s the problem? I haven’t the ability to be a grown up. Perhaps I need the guidance and instruction? I’m not trying to find an excuse for failure. I WANT SOMETHING TO WORK. Maybe I’m just looking for someone to tell me, without harsh criticism and judgement, that they’ll help me do this if I take it on and not belittle me for the choice I make. Because really? Everything feels really shameful right now. Adding to the fact that my help may be coming from an infomercial makes things that much more humiliating.

Tasty things to do with Rice Ball Swans.

Yea.. okay, that sounds really weird, but lemme explain — Mom’s been making me rice balls for the last week or so, in 3lb batches and traditionally when she makes these, usually for Chinese New Year, she always makes a whole bunch of neato shapes: balls, swans, a “nest” for said birds and with the rest of the dough, just makes a big long snake for the bottom of the steamer basket to cut into chunks and eat how you please.

The first batch she made last week, I just took home the balls to eat and she kept the swans and most of the snake. Sunday, when she & Dad were headed out to Older Bro’s for dindin, they dropped off all sorts of stuff she had been busy making: some homemade dumplings that are similar to ha gao only they had turnip and pork inside, a big pie plate of lo bok go (it’s gonna be so tasty once I fry up the slices in a little oil til crispy.. so yummy!) and a full 3 lb batch of rice balls. Swans and all.

So tonight is my first crack at this batch of rice balls and I decided to sacrifice the swans. For some reason this week’s rice balls seem to be tastier than last week’s batch and I am unsure as to why. Regardless, I took the two swans out of the bag, hacked them into round slices and topped the pieces with lots of cheese, some hot sauce and the last of the bison meatballs that I smashed into bitty pieces. After nuking til hot and cheese meltied, I doused the whole thing in what remained of my birthday bottle of Three Banditos Salsa Olivos from Biggieness.

I have to say, it’s pretty damn tasty. Like nachos, only better because they’re not hard and crunchy which would ordinarily make my mouth hurt. And a lot more filling and comfort-foody. The rice balls are nice and warm and soft, but not chewy like mochi is. These are just like… well.. a densely-textured rice cake. I call them rice balls only because that’s the form they take, but really, we’re essentially talking about a rice dough that’s steamed until it’s a solid mass and cut into chunks to be eaten.

My typical way of eating rice balls is that I just chop the balls into rounds, nuke til hot and then douse in soy sauce & sesame oil… and if I happen to have some vietnamese fish cake/sausage on hand, oh happy day! Pretty simple, and again, comfort food.

My third way I’ve come to making them is I just cut them into rounds and then pan-fry in a little oil before dousing the lot in soy sauce and sesame oil. Not really much different than the nuking, but it just gives it a nice crispy fried texture on the outside. And really, who doesn’t like fried noodles?

So having to deal with this whole no-wheat thing, as much as I’ve been griping about the lack of bread and crackers in my diet the last couple of weeks, I’m really not suffering as badly as I have in the past. I think everytime I have to revisit this “no wheat/carbs/starch” thing, it gets easier only because I know and am remembering what I can eat that will keep me feeling full and relatively satisfied. And if I’m lucky, I will soon have my hands on a soda cracker recipe which will save me having to fork over seven bucks for a tiny little wee box of crackers at the organic store everytime I need a hit.

A bread recipe too, in time, will come when I’m ready to start experimenting with wheat-free baking. Right now, the cravings for bread aren’t nearly as bad as they were when I first started eliminating it a few years back. Yes, I still crave a sandwich or a slice of toast with butter, but I don’t feel as desperate for it since I’ve found that Glutino makes a decent-ish bread approximation (compared to Kinnikinnik, at least. Their breads, the first brand I tried way back when, are rather icky) and I have a loaf now stashed in the freezer, divided into sliced pairs, so I am set for the next while. When the need for “real” bread overtakes me, I know where I can easily buy my supplies and I know a rather *cough* hawt, gay *cough* boy who is willing to share his knowledge with me.

So for now, I shall eat the rather shameful excuses for crackers that I bought yesterday out of desperation and know that soon, I will have homemade crackers and bread that won’t each cost me the price of half a tank of gas for my little car… cuz that’s basically how much it costs just to have something proper to eat with cheese.

Food for thought.

Yesterday was the appointment with the CPC Dietician.

It was a rather fun-filled hour with the lady, compared to the rest of my appointments — but I think that has something more to do with the fact that the lady was super friendly & funny.

It was also kind of nice to have gone in and she’d already experienced someone with scleroderma & swallowing issues. I guess the team’s biggest concern was that I’m not absorbing enough nutrients with the small quantities I consume at meals and when I keep barfing stuff up after eating.

According to the Dietician, compared to other patients with chronic pain, I’m doing pretty awesome — I have a regular eating schedule, I eat smaller meals at mealtime, I take supplements and have a can of Ensure daily (well… except weekends). Yes, she said she could get nit-picky about my diet, like there’s not a lot of variety, could use more fibre to deal with the constipation issues, eat more in the fruits & veg department but really, as far as she’s concerned, if I can keep some things down that I eat and maybe consider the idea of taking an Omega-3 supplement on top of my current multi-vit, calcium, vit.D & magnesium cocktail, I’m doing alright.

She couldn’t really come up with any brilliant suggestions beyond what I’m already doing mainly because I’ve already pretty much established what I can or can’t comfortably consume. For example, when talking about adding fruit to my daily food intake, we discussed that it would basically end up being an entire meal for me because my stomach can’t accomodate much more volume than what is a normal sized apple, or pear or plum. When given those two options, she would rather I skip the fruit and have my normal mini meal instead because basically it’s a difference between eating sugar & fibre (in the case of the fruit) or a bit of fibre, calcium and protein (in the case of a small sammich).

But having said that, maybe I could try incorporating a smoothie into my day for extra calories/fruit/fibre — it would give me some fruit, some fibre, some calcium and if I added a protein powder or something, that pretty much makes it a decent meal for someone like me even if it takes me more than 2 hours to consume. I could also be adding things like flax seed to baked goods, not that I generally eat the stuff I bake, but I it would definitely benefit The Hubbs’ diet since he’s been recommended to significantly up his water & fibre intakes.

Really, I think the only positive change we could come up with was to try and add more fruit & fibre to my eating, even if it’s in the formed of apple sauce or canned fruit cups. I guess when your body’s not normal, all the rules go out the window and you take what you can get, how you can, in any form you imagineable o_O

The only other thing we touched on was my weight gain, since that’s been the biggest issue on my mind. The Dietitician thinks it’s gotta be all the meds in some way, shape or form that’s causing the weight gain. Calorically, I’m not eating a lot to begin with and if I’m barfing up at least 1 meal a day, that’s even less calories consumed than when originally calculated so there is the possibility that my body may be thinking it’s in starvation mode — meaning that I’m generally eating so few calories that my body’s hording everything I consume because it’s scared I won’t be eating again for a long time. I asked if I added to my diet one smoothie a day into my eating would it make me fatter. She doesn’t know for sure, but it would definitely help to get more good stuff into me if I don’t barf it up, unlike a lot of other things.

Apparently a lot of the CPC patients have a problem of eating extremely irregularly, if at all, because of their pain — some of them gorge one large meal a day starting a 4pm and that’s it for their sustenance and usually it ends up being complete crap like 3 big mac meals from McD’s or something. Admittedly, I’m also not as physically active as I could be, but since the goal of the CPC to getting patients active isn’t so much to prep them to become marathon runners or anything like that, it’s just to get them onto the path of mobility and maintenance to have a better quality of life. So the energy expenditures are rather low.

So yea, yesterday still left me with typical day of “I’m sorry, I don’t know what to tell you. You already know what’s going on with your body and what you can or can’t handle… so yea, sorry.”

She did give me a couple of handouts, just so she wouldn’t feel badly about not having given me any information at all to take home to mull over. One is on Omega-3’s and the other on Non-Obstructing/Modified Fibre Diet Guidlines.

The Omega-3 handout wasn’t particularly interesting: up my intake of fish, which I totally would if I had unlimited funds to pay for sashimi. Change my regular eggs to Omega-3s, use canola oil for cooking, use a canola oil based margarine spread like becel (ew ew ew) for toast, and maybe add some ground flax seed to the stuff I bake. Out of that list, I’m thinking only 3-4/5 of that list is realistic for me…. the becel margarine spread just makes me ill and I really have no idea how The Hubbs can stomach eating it :x

Reading the Modified Fibre Diet sheet, it’s kind of interesting. Everything on this sheet is totally against what Canada’s Health Food Guide recommends for healthy eating: Choose refined breads and cereals, canned or cooked fruit without skins, well-cooked and canned veggies, cooked potatoes and yams without skins, well cooked tender meat, poultry and eggs, creamy nut butters, fish & seafood (except shrimp). Avoid any breads containing cracked wheat, multigrain, bran, whole seeds, nuts or raw/dried fruit like raisins. Avoid wild rice, stringy fruit, peels of fruits with tough skins like apples, pears & grapes, membranes of citrus fruits, fruits with small seeds like kiwi, figs & berries, drid fruit. Avoid raw veggies, leafy veggies, veggies with small seeds like tomatoes, cukes, zucchini, stringy veggies, tough skins/outer coatings like peas, pea pods, corn green/red peppers, eggplants, mushrooms. Avoid tough fibrous, gristly meats, shrimp, nuts & seeds, dried beans, peas. Other things to avoid: popcorn, coconut, olives, pickles, relish, dried fruit candies, jams with seeds.

That’s a heckuva lot of stuff to avoid and miss out on in the food world. Of course, as with everything, if my body can handle any of the “avoid” list, I’m more than a-okay to go ahead and continue eating them. But if there are some things I can’t eat, there are the alternatives.. and in this case, the alternatives make me sad thinking about eating things like soggy canned vegetables, like green beans, a la MIL.

I will try and change my diet some.

Not drastically, since that’s been pretty much a bust everytime I try to instill some new hardcore regime like having a salad with dinner every single night, but perhaps little bits as they feel right.

Maybe I will start with buying those Omega-3 eggs, and try eating oatmeal once or twice a week made horchata-style and adding a small bit of ground flax meal to the pot. If I could convince The Hubbs that we need to go out for sushi so I can get my Omega-3 levels topped up, you think he’d go with that? ;D

And maybe I can try adding a smoothie into my daily intake of foods… it might mean we’ll have to start adding soymilk, bananas, fruity yoghurt, chocolate syrup and peanut butter to the grocery list on a more regular occassion.

We’ll see how it goes… baby steps… baby steps.

In the meantime, this was breakfast:

Horchata Oatmeal
2 1/4 cups horchata made with milk
1/2 cup steel-cut oats

In a small pot, bring horchata to a boil.
Add oatmeal and turn down heat to simmer, stirring occassionally.
Cook for 20-25 minutes and serve.

Not being a huge oatmeal lover, this was pretty darn awesome for the first significantly snowy day of winter ^_^

Oh and guess what? MY LITTLE CAR IS FINALLY READY!!! I get to bring Eggnog home tonight! :D

In the meantime, we’re at T-Minus 45 minutes until the Oxygen Peeps show up at my front door.

*worries*

*heart!*

Sunny side up eggs, laying face down on buttered, toasted, cheese bread.

Damn it’s been forever since I’ve had eggs for breakky, let alone on TOAST.

I love bread too much. Toast with butter and creamed honey, garlic bread to mop up spaghetti sauce, ciabbatta with happy shrooms & cheese, baguette to soak up mussel juices, a fresh and still slightly warm loaf of cheese bread so you can eat it in the car by tearing out the squishy insides… yeaaaa.

In other news: Day 14 of Dandilion Patrol.

I have to think of something to bring on Saturday to a friend’s BBQ.

So far, nothing is grabbing my attention and I really have no desire to bring a dessert unless I absolutely have to (plus it sounds like there will be a lot of desserts anyhow).

Wheee!!

I get to do bad things for the next week and some ^_^

So to speak, at least.

Saw Family Doc today for monthly visit and…. *blank*

…Uhm…

Well, we may have come upon a reason for me turning green — it could be the Reynaud’s that’s doing it to me. Every now and then I turn up at the office wearing mittens because my fingers have gone deathly white. He’s seen it before, but for some reason he’s rather amazed (perplexed?) by it every single time. It makes my rather long fingers look that much more intimidating when they’re cold and white and he touches them. Anyhow, he thinks that perhaps it’s a lack of circulation to my face. *shrugs*

As to other things discussed:

* I told him about my call from Rheumy and what the current plan of action is. We went over my last few months of test results (since January, in fact) and he couldn’t figure out which liver enzyme tests she was referring to as being elevated since May’s results certainly weren’t the highest I’d ever reached in the past.

* The exhaustion is killlllllllling me… I am so tired of it, no pun intended. When I get my usual end-of-month labwork done, I’ll be adding a few more tests this time around to the list to see if there’s anything else going on.

* Having brought up the topic of extra lab work, I asked Family Doc if it would be possible to get a gluten intolerance test done at the same time if I spend the next week and some pumping myself full of wonderful bready/pasta/wheaty goodness to see if we can finally get an answer on my recurring tummy troubles. Everything is all set up for that too, yay me.

To sum up: I get to eat all sorts of carby goodness and see if we get any helpful results from putting myself through misery over the next week and some.

Onwards, my carb-loving companions!

The never ending weekend crap…

Saturday was actually an absolutely awesome day. It was gorgeous out, temperature was in the mid-high 20’s and we drove around town to do a little window shopping. Sunday, albeit a great morning spent with Poetry Boy and relatively nice afternoon being with The Hubbs roaming the mall, ended up being just crappy.

The plan for Saturday was just get out and about while the weather was still nice. The forecasts had been sunny & warm with thundershowers in the late afternoon for both Saturday and Sunday. The sunny and warm certainly did not disappoint. Absolutely gorgeous, as long as you could stand the heat. From the short walk around, we hit up Inglewood so I could visit Bite Groceteria and bumped into an old coworker from the spa in the process.

The store is absolutely adorable and there was a whole bunch of stuff I would have loved to buy had I had the money — truffle oil, some smoked sea salt, dried pasta from Italy, San Marzano tomatoes, etc. Of course, me buying dried pasta right now probably would not have been the greatest purchase, but I drooled over the thought anyways.

After Inglewood, we went in search of Pudding Yarn and discovered it’s located right around the corner from 17th Ave. For those of you hockey fans that might remember: it’s also known as The Red Mile, in case you’re wondering. I have to say, from the few yarn stores I’ve hit up in town, I think Pudding has been the nicest, followed by the now retired Knit One Chat Too.

Unintentionally, I ended up making a bit of a splurge purcahse at Pudding. I got myself a new bag. It’s a really, really, really, really nice bag…. and it’s pink. Like blindingly pink in the sunlight. (Yanno, I keep trying to steer clear of pink, but damnnit, it keeps coming back and biting me in the ass to get attention!) I got me a Namaste Zuma bag. It’s pink.

After our afternoon jaunt, we headed home to try and escape the heat (and possible sunburn in process from sitting in the car) and just vegged out for the rest of the afternoon. After having been to Pudding oggling the pretty yarns and even daring to squish a few, I had a need to find a new project to start. I spent the rest of my afternoon in bed with all the crocheted magazines in my posession trying to find the right pattern for what was in my head. I want to start a little summer shrug using either the really nice cotton I had bought right before K1C2 closed back in the new year or the reclaimed sari silk yarn I bought in Canmore last year(?) So far no luck. I’ll probably be doing an exhaustive online search and I think I might have an idea of where to start my research, if I remember correctly from past attempts.

Sunday, started out decently and just turned into a mess. It started out with me waking up at about 330am or so and not being able to get back to sleep. I met up with Poetry Boy for breakfast and had a great time as always then had coffee at the ‘Bucks to finish of the morning. When I got home I had planned on having a nap but when The Hubbs said he wanted to run to the mall to get a cable for his iPod touch so he could hook it up to the stereo in the loft, I decided to go with him. Really bad idea had I thought it through. By that point I was running on about three hours of sleep and way too much coffee.

After roaming the mall for about an hour and a half, we stopped at the grocery store to pick up a couple of things for dinner, came back home, had a snack and I crashed hard. In fact, I never quite recovered and am still feeling crappy right now.

Part of my feeling crappy other than the obvious of lack of sleep and over doing things activity wise, in my opinion, was eating wheat-y stuff all week. I knew better, but to some degree, I just didn’t care. So it came back to haunt me. Completely my own fault. Exhaustion to the point of not being able to think, soreness all over, a week-long headache, no appetite, bloaty feeling and slight fever. How awesome is that? Everyone wants those constant ailments, don’t they? :P

So now I am going to try and go back to cleaning up my diet and hope with fingers crossed that I feel better again. I’m not saying, as of yet, that all those symptoms went away after I stopped eating the wheat, but I think I should be more mindful of how things do progress when I am paying more attention to food. Today hasn’t been all that great either, to be honest. I woke up with yet another headache, I feel heavy all over over like there’s a weight pressing down on me from every side (that might be weather related, though) and I’m feeling anxious, not to mention the fact that for some reason I’m blowing blood out my nose which was a rather huge shock. It could just be me being all mentally jittery knowing the imuran is out of my system and I’m seriously worried about a flare-up, but blood in any form is probably not a great thing for me. Calgary’s extreme dryness, even with the rain, could also be a factor for the nose. I haven’t discounted that.

Man, this is tiring.

In other unrelated news — The dandelion battle seems to have eased up somewhat. I’ve not had to pick anything for a good number of days now, but oh the poor grass. Poor, poor grass. The Hubbs mowed the lawn yesterday and it looks so sad and dry and crispy in places. Not to mention, brown. I hope it makes a hardy recovery during the summer. *sigh*

I look like a heathen.

Sooooo… yeah.

After dindin tonight, The Hubbs and I went off and did something we rarely do: We went out and about.

No particular destination in mind other than EB Games for The Hubbs to pick up a game that was released today (no idea what he picked up, sorry) and then perhaps to the top of the city for a bit of a walk.

Whatever game it was that The Hubbs wanted, he managed to pick up and we also picked up EA Sports Active for the Wii. I hadn’t intended on buying it, but I kept seeing the commercials on tv. I don’t even know why we bought it. Well, that’s not entirely true. The Hubbs is still trying to get me to up my physical activities level and if it involves something for the Wii that might be fun, encouraging and motivating, then so be it. He won’t even bat an eye.

So on top of having battled the Dandilions today, I’ve done one full workout with the Active. I hadn’t read any reviews on the product, nor had I even visited the website before right this very minute. Had I actually skimmed the box before purchasing, I probably would have given it back to the guy at the store to put it back on the shelves.

Why? I suppose it’s a rather silly reason, in the scheme of things: It’s endorsed by Bob Greene. Bob, who? Oprah’s former(?) personal trainer.

Regardless, it’s too late now. The box is open and everything’s already been unpacked.

Verdict? It’s more physically intense than Wii Fit by far, but little things about the game turn me off.

It’s cool that the game includes a resistance band and the thigh strap is rather ingenious, I just had a tough time getting the band to stay put the first few minutes of my workout. Turns out that sitting down and putting on the thigh strap is the wrong way to go — when you stand up, the strap falls right off your leg. My bad.

I will admit, I am far more attracted to cute than I am realism. Active is based on pseudo-realism, as opposed to (Wii) Fit‘s pure cuteness for motivation and encouragement. Having to design yet another avatar of myself within North American parameters is somewhat depressing and far less cute than using a caracatured Mii.

As for your personal trainer’s constant quips? I find it to be hugely un-motivating. The narrator/trainer’s voice during example sessions of how to do an exercise, I have no issues with. It’s when I’m doing the workout with the trainer that I get annoyed. It’s rather parrot-like. “You can do it!”, “Great job!”, “You’re doing great!”, “You can do better than that.”, etc, etc, etc… Fit’s voice is annoying too, but you know that it’s not meant to replicate a real person’s voice because it’s just an animated character on the screen trying to motivate you in a cute & fun way.

So how was the Active workout? Well… by the time my 20 minute workout was complete, I was drenched. I didn’t appreciate the program telling me that I wasn’t working hard enough for the workout I had chosen (easy), but that’s an inconsequential beef based on my own personal limitations. Fit would make me warm and a little bit sweaty, but not full on drenched to the point of needing a shower like I did tonight. As for the heathen-look? That’s what happens when I choose not to properly fix my hair before it air dries into its own craziness.

I guess this means I’ll have a few things to keep track of:

* Day 12 Battle of the Weeds
* Day 01 Active

On a completely different note, we went to Planet Organic after hitting up EB Games. I spent monays there.

As The Hubbs said, “Jeez you’re an expensive date tonight!”

I picked up a whole bunch of stuff, just wandering up and down the aisles, picking up stuff that sounded good: New Moon Kitchen Gluten-free cookies (chocolate macaroons), Real Brew Outrageous Ginger Ale (known as Natural Brew in the US), Liberté Méditerranée Dulce de Leche yoghurt (!!), a pack of organic strawberries, a bottle of Highwood Crossing’s Cold Pressed Canola Oil (aka Canada’s Olive Oil), and a bag of organic ginger spice hard candies (in hopes of settling my nausea while we were out and about).

I have two words for the yoghurt: OH. MY. GOD.

Okay, that’s three. Whatever.

Remember my whole thing about Liberté’s cottage cheese? I just had the exact same tastegasmic experience with their yoghurt. It’s smooth, it’s rich, it’s creamy, it’s heavy, and it doesn’t have that sour twang that makes your tastebuds juice. I also realize that it’s 8.5% milk fat. Yum.

The flavour of the dulce de leche isn’t cloyingly sweet, it’s just the right smoothness and sweetness to accompany the rich creaminess of the yoghurt. I could have possibly eaten at least half the tub standing at the sink. Damn that stuff’s awesome. I am a yoghurt & cottage cheese convert… at least to Liberté’s products. A couple more thoughts on yoghurt — Liberté also has a tzatziki sauce that I love and buy on the odd occassion. It comes in about 250ml tubs with a lid. It is extremely yummy. When I finish the dulce de leche yoghurt, I’m going to give their goat milk yoghurt with honey a try. That comes in only a small 150ml(?) container as opposed to the regular 500ml tubs.

I guess I know what I’m having for breakky tomorrow — sliced strawberries with baby bananas & dulce de leche yoghurt. Hawt Damn. I am excited!

Yay for sun!

I imagine that it will be short-lived, but it will be enough for another attack on the weeds.

We’re doing well on Day 12 of the Weed Battle.

I, on the other hand, am not doing so well.

I’m still exhausted beyond belief and I have apparently turned a slight shade of… green. o_O;

I was napping on the sofa yesterday afternoon and when The Hubbs got home, he sat down and took one look at me and went all worried.

Not wearing my glasses, he’d not noticed the very very bruised circles under my eyes and apparently I’ve turned a not so healthy shade of green. Emphasis on green, not yellow.

We shall see what Family Doc says next week when I see him for my monthly.

In slightly different news — The last two days have been rather sucky on the no-wheat-diet front. I’ve been so tired the last two days that I haven’t cared about what I’ve been eating for supper. The only thought processes were: Make food for dindin. Eat food. Go to bed. Worry about feeling sick later.

Having said that, because I stayed home while The Hubbs did a grocery run (very sad, I was not being able to go), yesterday we had for the first time in a really long time: Frozen pizza. o_O; It was my request and The Hubbs obliged by bringing home 2 different kinds: 1 Delissio Half & Half Rising Crust pizza and 1 Our Compliments indian flat bread pizza. I got to choose and the other went into the freezer for another day. He also brought home a bunch of other junky bits.

The Delissio was NASTY. Actually, that’s not entirely true. The parts of the pizza that had actually baked properly were alright, but the middle of the pizza and the side that was labeled “deluxe” was still uncooked and squidgey. Uncooked pizza dough is gross. As for their marketing tag line, “It’s not delivery, it’s Delissio!”? I can believe it’s not delivery and it’s so not delissio. YUCK.

So tonight, I’m going to make thai green curry with the last of the chicken and rice. That should be good enough.

Dandilion Patrol is back!

…Sort of.

It’s not snowing, but it’s still pretty darn chilly outside — just under 10C with cool winds.

Today is Day 11 of the Dandilion Patrol (thanks PT, for that one) and it wasn’t too bad.

Those dandilions that were brave enough to surface were anihilated relatively quickly and now we just hope for the warm weather to return.

Dinner tonight is going to hurt: creamy chicken noodle casserole using the chicken from the homemade chicken soup last week. In fact, I’m already feeling it just from taste testing.

*sigh*